Creatures of Habit - Making a Healthy Marriage a Habit

We are creatures of habit. Without a doubt, what our body does on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday... our mind will want to do on Friday.

What we read and spend time thinking about early in the week, this will remain in our minds and prompt our actions for the rest of the week.

The way you react to your spouse on Friday, Saturday and Sunday has an impact on how you react to him/her on Monday.

There is no "One" sure-fire answer to creating/keeping the perfect marriage. However, there are sure fire actions to creating the right environment for a healthy marriage. As creatures of habit, we need to work on developing those healthy habits in order to guide ourselves into a great future with our spouse.

I think modern (popular) science has influenced us (Americans) to believe most answers (assuming there is one answer) to problems are categorical: yes/no or black/white or 2 eggs a day for good health or 3 Tablespoons of this exactly will cure you. I think we have been fed the idea that there should be a single answer that can lead to truth or well-being in one area of life or another.

In my opinion, this influence transfers over to our relationship beliefs. For instance, I hear a lot of people say if we "pick the right person to marry" our marriages will be full of happiness and last forever. As if there were some scientific finding that told you how to pick the perfect person. The only problem with that theory is that you have to pick a HUMAN, who is sure to have some faults. 

I think the "picking the right person" solution is a myth. The path to an ideal marriage isn't about picking another human that will make your life perfect. Instead, it's about controlling our actions with the spouse we have chosen. This is much more boring and takes a lot of time. It's not sexy or easy to say in a few words.

Being the creatures of habit that we are, it is important to spend time around people that are living the way you *would like* to be living. For example, hang out with other couples that really seem to work well together. It's important to respond to your spouse in a calm and/or positive manner if that is how you would like respond in the future. What you do today does effect what you do tomorrow.

It's the same with weight loss. If I decide not to work out today, the odds are good that I won't work out tomorrow. You won't do it unless you start doing it today. If you eat a salad today for lunch, it will be easier to eat a salad tomorrow for lunch.

Start doing the right thing today and it will get easier to do tomorrow. Hang out with people who you want to influence you today, so you can grow more wise tomorrow. Show love to your spouse today even if it's hard to do because it might be easier to do tomorrow.